Sartorial tips

Okay, how many of you EVER thought you'd read a post from me with that title? No one? Oh well, I sure never thought I'd write a post with such a title -- until now.

Tuesday's edition of the Decatur Daily had a "wonderful" article to help out us clueless folks who just don't know what to wear on a first date. A couple of caveats. First, it's obvious the article was written for the teen audience -- leaves me out. Second, the article was written by a woman. Actually that's not my complaint. My beef is that the article was written by a woman who knows absoultely nothing about men. We're really simple creatures. Ms. Klepper [the writer], eloquently described the feelings and opinions of her female subjects, but when it came to the males, she was dumbfounded:

This fashion investigation taught me a few things about the male opinion of female apparel, some of which I could barely bring myself to think about, much less write.

Shockingly, guys really don't care about the current styles and trends in women's wear. [My emphasis.]

Maybe she was being sarcastic, but I don't think so. I'm actually wondering if Ms. Klepper is a high school intern at the DD. Seriously, that's what the whole story reminded me of -- one of those cutesy pieces we used to run in "The Wildcat's Roar" -- the finest HS paper in TN, at least when she was editor.

Anyway, I did pick up a few useful 1st date tips from Ms. Klepper.

• Tuck in my shirt. Okay, I can handle that. One of the first things I do after class is untuck my shirt, but I can put up with that during a date -- especially the first date.
• Iron my shirt. Hmm, I'm in trouble here. Nah, even given my deep philosophical opposition to the practice, I'd be willing to do that -- again, on the first date.
• No jewelry, other than a watch. All I got to say to that is, "Amen, sister."
• No baggy pants and untied shoes. Again, not an issue.
• Be very cautious about wearing jeans. Huh? Sure I get that if we're going to a "nice" place, but what if the first date is a movie or coffee or a drink at the bar? Does the "no jeans" rule still apply? By the way, even though guys (essentially) are told not to wear jeans, I noticed that the girl featured in the "appropriate dress" sample picture is wearing denim! What gives?

Despite my grumblings, I thought Ms. Klepper had done an okay job on pointing out some "dos" and "do nots" of the first date -- UNTIL I got to the male "appropriate dress" sample picture.

Dang it. I tried and tried, but I couldn't get the picture to post. That ruins the whole entry. Grr! Oh well, click through and scroll down to see the picture.

All I can say is, ... I'M NOT WEARING THE HAT!

Anyway, I used the article in stats class this morning as an example of sample selection and how you need to make sure your sample is representative if you want your data to have external validity. [Translation: If you want to make society-wide generalizations about what one should wear on a 1st date, you should talk to more than just a few high school kids.] So after we discussed the article, I stressed to the students that no matter what the article said, I WAS NOT WEARING THE HAT! A young lady in the front row chimed in with, "Yeah, but wouldn't you actually have to HAVE a date before the hat became an issue?" Yeah, she's been in my classes before. I like her.